“Hey Neville, here’s your Remembrall back.”
“You were always nice to me, Potter. Don’t come to potions class tomorrow.”Geez that’s dark. Upvote.
Year one: threat averted, most students unaffected
Year two: several students attacked but no deaths
Year three: alleged killer on the loose but nobody gets hurt
Year four: two students are kidnapped from athletic competition, one killed and the other almost killed
Year five: strangely, no attacks on the school
Year six: student attempts to kill principal twice, injuring two other students in the process, then lets in an army of known killers to attack the school, principal is killed
Year seven: big battle, several people killed on both sides
Another way to think of year five is that there was a terrorist attack on an unofficial school club’s field trip.
Year three: alleged killer on the loose but nobody gets hurt
I mean, several students get attacked by a werewolf and 100 dementors in the same night, nearly resulting in 3 people (2 of them students) losing their very souls. And of course, poor Draco maimed by Buckb- uh… I mean, Witherwings.
Year five: strangely, no attacks on the school
That’s a very diplomatic way to skirt around the governmental coup of the school implementing totalitarian control by a racist megalomaniac, restricting basic rights, turning students into secret police, and punishing discent with literal fucking torture.
Clearly, the High Inquisitor program was a success, and the fake news Daily Prophet was libelously alleging it wasn’t.
Wands don’t kill people, wizards kill people
At least in this case a bad guy with a wand was stopped by a good guy with a wand. Come on people.
Voldemort almost killed Ginny with a book.
The pen is mightier than the sword indeed
Time to ban books
Now I’m imagining him beating her repeatedly with a book.
If you see something send a howler about it.
As the local Auror at Hogsmeade I advise against sending howlers. Please just use your patronus like a normal person when you send a message to us. We don’t need 4000 howlers in our office, thanks.
This was my signature on a BBS a long long time ago lol
doesn’t count, it wasn’t by a trans student or they were “gang violence”
*gets shot in neck*
Didn’t Voldemort, like, grow an entirely new body after his previous one was obliterated? That’s gotta count as some form of trans- prefixed thing, right? Like transubstantiation?
He also changed his name
And nobody knows what to call them, so they just say “you know who”
The new body is distinctly inhuman, so it’s also transhumanism.
I don’t think cloning is a trans thing
He did change the appearance of his original body pretty drastically, though. Maybe horcruxes are just how JKR views transition.
Every time you factcheck a transphobe your gender fragments and becomes harder to destroy
Oof ouch right in my genders
If you fragment your gender into small enough particles, it will become a gender fluid
The school sorts you into one of four gangs for this express purpose.
Red : bloods.
Blue : crips
Yellow : banana boys.
Green : ???Grove Street
At least it was, before you fucked everything up
That story isn’t worth thinking about in any shower.
I got the first and the second book from my mom when they came out. While i didn’t love them per se, i liked them enough that they peaked my interest in becoming a reader, and i started to read more books, and i’m thankful for that.
Since then i had a few girlfriends who were super into HP and they made me watch the movies, and i have to say, these stories are not thought out at all, and are often dumb as hell. I don’t really remember much, but just the fact that quidditch doesn’t make a lick of sense is really telling. Or goblet of fire, they were okay to let them play with dragons. Everyone shrugged and told HP that well, he might die. Someone would’ve drowned if he didn’t break the rules and people were pretty upset about the rule breaking. And at the end, Cedric died and everyone was absolutely shocked and devastated that someone died at the murder tournament.
True… What actually inspired that thought, indirectly, was thinking about how the anime I was watching (seven spellblades) felt like a more interesting wizarding universe than HP. Also fuck JKR.
You should check out Mashle, it’s basically a parody of your typical “magic school” anime where the main character can’t use magic and literally just out muscles everyone.
Its also gloriously hilarious, plus…
Your magic is strong, but my squats are stronger
Is just pure poetry
Mashle is very distinctly a Harry Potter parody, yep. All the way to the “chosen one” scar. Even the magic school headmaster looks 1 to 1 like anime Dumbledore.
You should delete this post.
Also fuck JKR
Meanwhile Hogwarts Legacy sold like 40mln copies? Most people don’t care about dumb politics
I doubt you would call it “dumb politics” if she was relentlessly campaigning against your right to exist in society as a person.
I honestly wouldn’t care
I have them tagged as “right wing PoS” so I’m not sure youre getting anywhere with them.
People also still use Meta products, Apple products, Amazon and their products, and so on, even though all of these companies directly support the budding fascist empire in the USA.
Likely, you too buy/use products by a corporation that supports the pumpkin dictator, and that has much more real-world effect (on trans people and on all other minorities too) than the ramblings of a mad old TERF.
At least Rowling isn’t directly stoking the genocide in Gaza or rounding up and deporting people to prison camps in other countries.
(I’m not defending Rowling. I’m just saying at a certain point most people, likely including you, value the convenience of next-day-shipping over the life of some people we don’t know.)
Rowling has spent tons of money petitioning the UK Supreme Court to basically make existing as a trans person in public illegal. She’s got more money than some cities do.
Like, legally, there is no where a trans man can piss in the UK. Not allowed in the women’s, not allowed in the men’s. Just got piss yourself.
Do you think Trump is better for Trans rights than Rowling? I don’t think so.
Yes, Rowling spends money petitioning the government and courts, but Trump is the government and controls the courts.
Don’t lose sight of the bigger enemy just because a smaller enemy is a woman.
Rowling is literally directly funding the erosion of trans rights in the UK. She IS directly responsible for attempted genocide.
Rowling funds petitions to the government. Trump is the government.
Don’t lose sight of the bigger evil.
Well I own it and I do, and most of my friends do as well (some of whom are trans)
But yeah, fuck JKR.
I mean I was conflicted about buying a copy and did not until (a) my wife wanted one and (b) I saw our trans sister had a copy.
Maybe you should ask your sister if she actually cares about JKR drama?
Loudly privileged complaint post
Most American take on the story ever!
