Rejected by Don Hertzfeldt

Usually when mom’s abusive boyfriend stops by to beat the shit out of mom, he prefers if the cowering children don’t call 911 either.

SANTA! [bangs head]

Your phone doesn’t ring at 3am with a list of movies you’re supposed to hate?

🪷

It’s been this way for many years. The universities are simply too willing to accept inflated international tuition payments. There are nationals of adversaries all throughout our advanced programs. I’ll grant that most of them are probably not spies. But even if a fraction of them are, we’re badly exposed. The numbers are outrageous. It’s a gaping wound in our security and future stability to have our advanced programs populated by the children and young adults of adversary nations. During the Cold War, you would mot have seen as many students from behind the iron curtain at MIT and Cal Tech. It would have been an obvious no-no. But the greed of today’s universities is boundless and reckless.

Here’s some from the US Holocaust Memorial Museum

Just as Republicans are hamstringing our republic. Someday we’ll find out why they all co spired to debase our security and standing in the world, but by then we’ll be neck deep in dead soldiers from WWIII and we won’t have time to reflect.

Try a revolution of the mind. Instead of looking for people who vibe with you, try to identify people with whom you can vibe. Instead of trying to get people to like you, allow yourself to like someone else. Then give that person a small compliment about the thing you like about them. “I like this guy’s jokes.” They will understand that you’re a fan, and you will have a mew friend.

You should see an ENT doctor - an otolaryngologist. They can examine your vocal cords. This year’s strain is being compared to razor blades in the throat. Sounds like yours could be related.

We’ve all been donating for decades already with our outrageously expensive healthcare. It’s the trade we make for European security guarantees.

In the meantime, Europeans get to go to the hospital for free and make fun of us for the situation.

And if there is a major war, they’ll expect US soldiers to defend them. Those soldiers will get their legs blown off, and they’ll come home to little support from the VA and still no national healthcare.

And use your own money!

Thank you for sharing that touching and beautifully-written story.

So they shot two surrendering people and then immediately desecrated their bodies with construction equipment by collapsing the garage door on top of the corpses. Is that what I just saw? Dishonor is baked in.

A charming story of fish neglect. Horrifying from Dave’s perspective.

There will only be a ceasefire after Israel has exterminated all the Palestinians, I’m afraid.

The decent people of the earth won’t forget.

It depresses me when people ask this question. It’s like asking, “which one of your friends do you invite over when you don’t want to have to interact much with anyone?” Umm - they’re my friends. I like them because of the quality of our interactions! Not just for their ambient body heat. That would make me a sociopath.

A Faustian shit show for the ages

There are! They’re called thermostatic faucets.