To this day, she remembers the racing thoughts, the instant nausea, the hairs prickling up on her legs, the sweaty palms. She had shared a photograph of herself in her underwear with a boy she trusted and, very soon, it had been sent around the school and across her small home town, Aberystwyth, Wales. She became a local celebrity for all the wrong reasons. Younger kids would approach her laughing and ask for a hug. Members of the men’s football team saw it – and one showed someone who knew Davies’s nan, so that’s how her family found out.

Her book, No One Wants to See Your D*ck, takes a deep dive into the negatives. It covers Davies’s experiences in the digital world – that includes cyberflashing such as all those unsolicited dick pics – as well as the widespread use of her images on pornography sites, escort services, dating apps, sex chats (“Ready for Rape? Role play now!” with her picture alongside it). However, the book also shines a light on the dark online men’s spaces, what they’re saying, the “games” they’re playing. “I wanted to show the reality of what men are doing,” says Davies. “People will say: ‘It’s not all men’ and no, it isn’t, but it also isn’t a small number of weirdos on the dark web in their mum’s basements. These are forums with millions of members on mainstream sites such as Reddit, Discord and 4chan. These are men writing about their wives, their mums, their mate’s daughter, exchanging images, sharing women’s names, socials and contact details, and no one – not one man – is calling them out. They’re patting each other on the back.”

  • rah@feddit.uk
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    1 day ago

    I don’t understand your argument and you haven’t addressed the issue at hand.

    Please spell out for me why a woman in a relationship with a man who believes that women shouldn’t have the right to vote, can’t exit that relationship?

    Victims of abuse are victims

    Note that the person you responded to didn’t mention abuse, you introduced the term “abuse”. We’re talking about women in relationships with assholes, not abused women.

    • Arkouda@lemmy.ca
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      1 day ago

      Victims of abuse are victims who need external assistance.

      You may better understand what someone is saying if you respond to their whole sentence and not just the part you wanted to attack.

      Abuse is abuse regardless of how small you as an outsider perceive it. Women in relationships with assholes who believe they should have no rights are always being abused by the aforementioned asshole.

      • rah@feddit.uk
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        1 day ago

        Women in relationships with assholes who believe they should have no rights

        Firstly, the original commenter who described the kind of relationship we’re discussing didn’t say “no rights” they said “shouldn’t be allowed to vote” which is a very much more limited view than what you’re raging against.

        are always being abused by the aforementioned asshole.

        That’s not the situation that was described by the original commenter. Just because someone is an asshole and has reprehensible views, doesn’t necessarily mean that they are abusive. There’s a difference and if you can’t see and acknowledge that difference then you’re just engaging in misandry. In which case, best of luck, take care, bye now.

        • Arkouda@lemmy.ca
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          You sure do like to cherry pick and blast incel rhetoric eh?

          Don’t worry about further response, you aren’t worth the time.

        • Scranulum@lemm.ee
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          Misandry is when someone says men who believe women shouldn’t be allowed to vote are abusive.

          Thank you for that elevated, nuanced take, king.

          • rah@feddit.uk
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            1 day ago

            Misandry is when someone says men who believe women shouldn’t be allowed to vote are abusive.

            That’s not what I said. I said there’s a difference between being an asshole and being abusive and if OP can’t see and acknowledge that difference then they’re engaging in misandry. I didn’t say anything about voting rights and misandry. Please don’t put words in my mouth or misrepresent what I say.

            • LandedGentry@lemmy.zip
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              22 hours ago

              That’s a ridiculous distinction and to hinge accusing someone of engaging in misandry on that just tells me you recently found a new word to make your red pill-lite views more palatable.

              • rah@feddit.uk
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                21 hours ago

                That’s a ridiculous distinction

                I’m not sure what distinction you’re referring to. I don’t care either.

                Edit: for that matter, I’m mystified as to why you are continuing to engage with me if you genuinely believe that I am victim blaming. Unless you don’t genuinely believe I am victim blaming, in which case why would you accuse me of that. Despicable.

                • Scranulum@lemm.ee
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                  21 hours ago

                  “Oh, I’m spreading rhetoric that hurts people? Why are you even responding to it, then?”

                  Your entire edit is actually a perfect microcosm of the victim blaming mentality, but (poorly) disguised as a virtue signal about victim blaming. Well done mate. Despicable.

                  • rah@feddit.uk
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                    21 hours ago

                    “Oh, I’m spreading rhetoric that hurts people? Why are you even responding to it, then?”

                    That’s not really a fair characterisation of the situation given that they said elsewhere:

                    “Later dude. This isn’t going to be productive.”

    • LandedGentry@lemmy.zip
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      1 day ago

      Have you forgotten the entire context of this thread? Did you even glance at the article? They also talked about women “not leaving piece of shit men” and a man who doesn’t want his partner to vote. Can you really not infer anything from that?

      • rah@feddit.uk
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        Have you forgotten the entire context of this thread?

        Nope.

        Did you even glance at the article?

        I read every word.

        They also talked about … a man who doesn’t want his partner to vote

        That is not what they talked about. They said “men who genuinely claim that women shouldn’t be allowed to vote”. That is not the same thing as a man who displays controlling behaviour over their partner.

        Can you really not infer anything from that?

        There’s no need for anyone to infer anything in this discussion, it’s quite clear and explicit what people are talking about.

        • LandedGentry@lemmy.zip
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          You have a very narrow understanding of what abuse is and clearly you can’t extrapolate larger points and only take things at face value, so I’ll be direct and concise: you are defending and engaging in victim blaming as you hide behind cheap rhetorical tricks.

          Later dude. This isn’t going to be productive. You’re clearly grinding an axe about some social hangup you have.

          • rah@feddit.uk
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            you are defending and engaging in victim blaming

            LOL bye now